My New Life with you.......

Hallo again it's me Cindy. it's been a very2 long time...ga nulis blog.....guess what, my life is getting so much better now...everything become better but i also gain much weight like 6kg, geez i hate that & im still struggle to decrease my weight....By the way....mom & dad is good...college is fine.....friends is fine too......& in the love life......actually before now, i found someone but he's a jerk & i for so many reason (good reason) its end between us.

You know what, people say "Life is a mystery.." & i agree with that....cause....after that bad experiences 'again', i finally found my light from all my darkness before....i found...i feel like i dont know....i feel so happy with him......he's like a complete package from God.....He's like ever been my dreams...i mean i want to be with someone with him, like it's my wish, & now my dreams do come true.......His name is Stevan..Stevan Halim....and i fall in love with him from the very 1st time, i mean he treat me so well......he's just like different, he's like my dream lover........he's protect me...& he really cares for me...he can be my boyfriend, my best-friend, my dad, my brother......there's no one like him.....

there's one night, he rides along the way to my place at this time right now, just because he's worried I didn't pick up the phone, just to check my condition make sure everything is okay, while the truth is I was fall asleep so that's why I didn't pick up the phone....I don't even have a word to say this, but he's the 1st guy that ever been took care of me like this...He did protect me...there's no one ever did this to me.....

when I'm lay in his arms i feel so comfort....when i'm with him.....i feel like home.....My favourite place is in his hug....

rasanya ga bisa jauh sm dia......i feel like so close with him.....i just wanna be with him every-single-day.............my baby Stevan.......my future husband....i love you so much....

Repost

G baru aj baca2 post2 g yg dulu...why am such a naif person ya...hahaha...by the way susah juga...inilah g....ga tau jg sih itu sebenerny kekurangan apa kelebihan..pgn bgt brubah jd ce yg dewasa yg ga pnh ngrsa galau lg but ya namany manusia masih idup jd ga mungkin ga ad feelingnya....

Wish Me Luck :*

Well finally tomorrow is the big day, the presentation day of susan budihardjo & crew im super excited, superscared, & everything. shakin' but want to move & done this. God give me your strength, make eberything become fine. i know You always have the best plan for my life. i love you God

LIFE

yeah....g percaya hidup ini indah..walo kita terkadang ngerasa sakit....& kehilangan org2 yg kita cintai....cici kangen lolin...ade cici yg paling cici sayang, ade cici satu2nya....sayang banget2...mungkin slama ini ada cara2 yg salah buat nunjukin sayangnya.tapi ga ada kog kakak yg benci ma adenya....i miss you my little angel....you're in heaven now...i miss you, i love you & wait for me yah lin..until my time is arrive, i'll be seeing you...i'm sorry i just cried again....i miss you my little sistah....from your big sistah....God please take a good care of her... & I'm sorry God, i'm still cannot be a perfect & better person in Your eyes...i'm really sorry..sometimes i feel like not "worthed" to be Your child, but i know, You all-forgiving to Your child...Thank you God for everything...i <3 You God..Please bless mom & dad too..bless my family...& i always know, You will give THE BEST in everything.....i give you all of my life God....

kill my anger

i just told my bro, Rin, sometimes i share things that i cannot share with anyone. okay...so what i have to do is...DO NOT let my freakin' big ego, take control of me, yeah, they r like weeds. huh, I HV TO TAKE CONTROL OF MYSELF, WON'T LET MY EGO CONTROL IT. NEVER NEVER EVER.

& i do trust my baby, so, other thing to do is, when my freakin' ego try 2 control me, i MUST remember it in my head & heart, TRUST TRUST & TRUST. yeah TRUST CINDY!!!!!!!!!! YOU TRUST HIM RIGHT, SO??????? WHAT ELSE MATTER THAN THAT, IT'S JUST YOU & HIM! REMEMBER THAT, JUST LIKE A PYRAMID, HURRICANE CAN'T SHAKE US :)
i trusting you hunny, i love you so much, i'm really sorry. i love you i love you i love you much more everyday!

hahahaha....;D

always remember,

1 Corinthians 13:4-8

⁴ Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵ It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶ Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

⁸ Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.

note from my brother Rin,
TRUST MORE IMPORTANT THAN LOVE, YOU CAN ALWAYS LOVE THE PERSON YOU TRUST
BUT YOU CAN'T ALWAYS TRUST THE PERSON YOU LOVE
AND ALWAYS LOVE YOURSELF FIRST BEFORE YOU LOVE OTHERS. SO YOU KNOW HOW TO TREAT THEM AS GOOD AS YOU TREAT YOURSELF.

thankyou so much brother, i'll always remember that. ;) have a great Sunday too by the way!

i feel..

i feel fuck today. lost my mood. sleep just for 3 hours with a fuckin' terrified nightmare, rrrrrggggh, damn it!

when i open my fb acc i just found these quotes..

You can't have a relationship without any fights, but you can make your relationship worth the fight.

There is no greater love than from those who know all your faults, and love you anyway. Remember: "To love, is to forgive!"

Everything changes except the nature of God and the nature of man. -@RickWarren

Learn to take risks in life because if you win, you can lead and if you lose, you can guide.

the last but not least, & i just feel that it just so true is..

A man should look for what he is, and not for what thinks he should be. –B.C. Schramme

have a great great morning. i hope today will not be sucks for me.

.....................

i really need someone right now. i need you to be here with me. i cannot sleep. please i just need your hug to make me feel safe.

..............

i just wanna cry.........

...

today, i'm screwed up. i'm fucking screwed up. so fucking childish, not grow up at all... I'm sorry B I feel like I screwed up your day............................................................................................................

i know i have to let go........ let it go..........release.........the nightmare from my past..........the darkest & the worse that ever happened to me...........................release...............set myself free.....from this fuckin' chain.........

i love you B, i dont want to hurt you because of my behavior & my thought, I'm really sorry...I'm just scared I will lose you....I'm just scared...I love you so much.........& I'm sorry....i'm really sorry.....

God, please help me.....give strength, please...i can't do this alone...i need You...i need Your help....i need Your miracle....please God..

my baby told me 'bout this song & i love it so much! hahahaa

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XlpeDpAmkQM

morning with love.

my honeyB, just way too sweet....he brought me a breakfast this morning, & suddenly he just shown up in kondo ;) dia sempet2in mampir sblm kerja cm bwt beliin & anterin sarapan..
i know that's just a simple thing, but you must know that, i love the simple things. it just feels like, someone cares about you. & it just makes me feel so comfort. i never meet someone like him. he makes me feel so comfort, he always thinking about my feeling, sometimes i just feel like he shows me some thing real, dunno why. or maybe i never find someone who cares like him. he's open my mask..my disguise..open my eyes..2 back to the real me.. & he's the only man that i ever found in my life so far, that never force me to grow my hair become long. Geez....surprised! HAHAHAHA.

i fall in love with him in a different way, not like what i used to be when i fall in love. i fall in love with him in...an amazing way. i feel like, i've known him before, but it's not. i just feel the connection with him when i'm with him. i just feel it.. that.. i love him so much. yeah, i love him so much. i won't lose him. i will never let him go. no matter what happen in the future, i'll keep holding on as long as i can. i just feel like, there's nobody like him. i love the way he shows his affection to me. & i will always fight for what i love. i'll try to be a better person, so that i can be his Mrs. Right. hope i can. i want to make him happy. he 'can' gave me a new heart, he's the only one who can do that. he can cure my pain with his affection, slowly but sure, little more & little more everyday, it recover slowly. i hope i can make it long, he can make it long, we can make it long.

I love you my baby Brian Agezar. I say it from my heart. Yeah, I LOVE YOU B!

Today, November 17th 2011

udah lama banget g ga nulis blog, update, curhat segala macem. well, today i decided to write more in my own blog.

Seminggu lagi pelajaran g di LPTB Susan Budihardjo abis. & ga nyangka kalo dipikir2, waktu itu bener2 cepet banget berlalu tanpa lu sadarin, ky lu tuh naek mobil yg tnp lu sadarin mobil tuh melaju dengan lumayan cepet & pas u liat jalan, oh man, shit, lu uda lewatin berkm2 tnpa lu sadarin.

yeah kira2 begitu lah yg ada dipikiran g sekarang. sometimes, semua kejadian2 di hidup g, terlintas dipikiran g satu persatu tanpa g inginin, it just like a movie. & seiring berjalanny waktu, g sadar, slama 21 thn ini, g udah belajar banyak banget dalam hidup ini, yg seneng, yg susah, yg sedih, yg bahagia, yg kecewa, yg sakit & dibalik semua itu ada 1 hal yg paling penting, pegangan, yg ga pnh boleh kita lepasin, yaitu "harapan". krn tanpa itu, lu atopun g ga akn bertahan dalam hidup ini.

& tnyt banyak hal2 yg tjdi diluar rencana. banyak rencana2 yg berubah. tentuny kita manusia cm bis merencanakan, hanya Tuhanlah yg bisa menentukan. & walo kadang kita ngerasa sakit, kecewa & trus bertanya2, why? kenapa? kenapa g? the answer is....
semua masalah yg ada di hidup lu, itu akn membentuk karakter & diri utk menjadi pribadi yg lbh baik & lbh dewasa lg. Trust me. walo emng awalny trasa sangat sulit. tapi, percaya, pada akhirny semua itu akan "worthed" kog buat hidup u & buat diri u. tetep semangat, keep the faith & the spirit. stay, be yourself, never change just for being liked/loved, if you wanna change, change to be better, BUT STILL, BE YOURSELF.

regards,
me <3 girl_in_move

lebaran 2010

Heran

duh...

g pk balsem geliga kbanyakan ni jd puanas bgt n kulit g merah..hiks :'(

Painting Flowers - All Time Low

Strange maze, what is this place?
I hear voices over my shoulder,
Nothing's making sense at all.
Wonder, why do we race?
When everyday we're runnin' in circles,
Such a funny way to fall.
Tried to open up my eyes,
I'm hopin' for a chance to make it alright.

When I wake up,
The dream isn't done.
I wanna see your face,
And know I made it home.
If nothing is true,
What more can I do?
I am still painting flowers for you.

Show my cards,
Gave you my heart,
Wish we could start all over.
Nothing's makin' sense at all.
Tried to open up my eyes,
I'm hopin' for a chance to make it alright.

When I wake up,
The dream isn't done.
I wanna see your face,
And know I made it home.
If nothing is true,
What more can I do?
I am still painting flowers for you,
I am still painting flowers for you.

I heard everything you said,
I don't wanna lose my head,

When I wake up,
The dream isn't done.
I wanna see your face,
And know I made it home.
If nothing is true,
What more can I do?
I am still painting flowers for you,
I am still painting flowers for you.

YUHUUUU IT'S SEPTEMBER! ;D

Hihihih....Horaaaayy, finally it's SEPTEMBER! ;D actually today is the 1st day of September.. hehhehe..hmmm dunno why i just love this month....hmm maybe because this month is my birthday. lol....
oooh i hope everything's will be alright...just flow away in its track....everything is gonna be fine....i know that...i know Father won't leave me alone...& i know Father will give the BEST for my life even-do there are a lot of difficulties that i HAVE & MUST been through...i know He give more strength to me....:D

Makasih y Tuhan..mungkin semua beban masalah, kesusahan, kesukaran dan kesedihan yg ada di hidup saya dmn saya pikir ini ud tlalu berat n tlalu lama saya pikul, mungkin agar saya makin dekat dgn Engkau...;) i will do my best Lord...Lead me in my every step in my life...ak jg akn brusaha...(= saya yakin Engkau mmpunyai rncangan & rncana msa dpan yg indah bwt saya..& mungkin Engkau mau pakai saya ya Tuhan...(= Thank you for this beautiful morning...

mu maem dl ah...huakakaaka..... :D

ga semua tau....

aaaah i feel bored bored bored....

ga da kerjaan bgt...

pgn buru2 msk aj ni....biar bs ngerjain ap gt....duh jd pngangguran mang ga enk! :(

drpd bosen...g mw ksh tw list2 lgu yg skrg jd top 5 ato top brp aj d yg psti itu lg g dengerin stiap hr... g rekomendasiin lgu2ny krn emng enk bgt...


Cindy's Playlist

1. Tonight - FM Static
2. She's Got You High - Mumm-Ra
3. Forever - Killing Me Inside
4. Into Your Arms - The Maine
5. Just The Way You Are - Bruno Mars
6. Like We Used To - A Rocket To The Moon
7. Pretend - Scott Porter and The Glory Dogs (ost. Bandslam)
8. Wish You Were Here - Hey Monday
9. When A Man Loves A Woman - Michael Bolton
10. The Only Exception - Paramore

dijamin donk pstiny playlist lgu2 g tdk mngecewakan.. hahahhaha. playlist ni kumpulan lgu2 pop punk slow acoustic alternative soul y intiny genre ksukaan g lah. yg pst lgu ny bukan ky lgu christian bautista. hahhahahhaha. tllu melow n lebay g ga sk! lol. yg psti plylist g c dalem smua d..hahahahahha

ini adalah lgu tmanis...lgu fav g slmanya...bwt org yg g cintain...=)

"Tonight" - FM Static

I remember the times we spent together
on those drives
We had a million questions
all about our lives
and when we got to New York
everything felt right
I wish you were here with me
tonight

I remember the days we spent together
were not enough
and it used to feel like dreamin'
except we always woke up
Never thought not having you
here now would hurt so much

Tonight I've fallen and I can't get up
I need your loving hands to come and pick me up
And every night I miss you
I can just look up
and know the stars are
holdin' you, holdin' you, holdin' you tonight

I remember the time you told me about when you were eight
And all those things you said that night that just couldn't wait
I remember the car you were last seen in
and the games we would play
All the times we spilled our coffees
and stayed out way too late
I remember the time you told me about your Jesus
and how not to look back even if no one believes us
When it hurt so bad sometimes
not having you here...

I sing,
Tonight I've fallen and I can't get up
I need your loving hands to come and pick me up
And every night I miss you
I can just look up
and know the stars are
holdin' you, holdin' you, holdin' you tonight

I sing,
Tonight I've fallen and I can't get up
I need your loving hands to come and pick me up
And every night I miss you
I can just look up
and know the stars are
holdin' you, holdin' you, holdin' you tonight


lagu ini diciptain sendiri sm vokalisny bwt ce ny yg mninggal waktu tragedi World Trade Center 11 sept...hiks...soo sad :'(

aaaa i realize......

hhhh....i realize, i cannot be selfish...i'm sorry yank....love you muuuaaaaaacchh ;*

thank's for your support tep....you'll always be my bff like forever.....=)
this is me n tepi wkt thn 08 wkt msh kuliah di mene (=


kmrn bis ktemu tp ga poto2..hiks..nti kl ktemu lg poto lg d breng tepi (dan antony pastiny, lol)

i feel like.......

too much problem again...... :'(
kpla g da psing krn 2 mslah brt ini..........
& then sister g mlah nglakuin hal ky gt...wtf??! i feel hurt bcos of her. ga bs mikir ap y, ga bs nghrgain kel sndr ap. g kan nci kandungny, kl g org laen c it's not a problem. cape g rasany... emang ud nglakuin ini itu tetp aj ga cukup baik. g muak jd ank sulung. g cpe msti jgain ade g yg ga tw trima kasih. ud cukup. oc, kl lo ga mw diatur, jgn pnh minta bantuan g lg bwt sterusny. u kan mrasa "bisa". y ud u lakuin aj sndr. jgn smpe menyesal u nglakuin in ke g. g nyesel dr dl sllu support n bntu u tp u tnyt malah ga bs ngharain g. bingung g u skola ap yg masuk di otak u c. sma bole ipa, tp otk u tnyt dngkal. g kesian sm lo sis... g brsyukur ga ky lo.

g mw pny hdp g sndr. krn g ud cpe ud muak... ga nyangka makin g gde beban g makin byk aj...msti gmn ni g....

ga pny tmn ngmng n tmn curhat.....tmn curhat dr dl cm ko ade.. n kdg2, ad be2rp hal2 yg pdhl ga brat2 bgt tp g ga bs curhat ma dy...misalny ky mslh ade g ini . mungkin krn dy gde breng qt2 jd g msti crhat ke org lain yg ga da hub drah...

cm ad 1 org dmn g bs crhat smuany sm dy... & y cm dy yg bs bikin g kuat......(i start crying while i write this...) dan....g kngen bgt sm dy...i miss him so much....rsany kl sm dy...g bs laluin smuanya n smuanya bakal baik2 aj.... :'(

pgn bs hdp sm dy aj n lupain smua mslh2 yg sllu bikin g skit.....